April 16, 2012

In Loving Memory of my Mom

Me, Mom, my sister Jo

I am still trying to process what happened this weekend.  On Thursday, I drove to Burelson, Tx where my sister lives, for a few days visit. On Saturday, April 14, I spoke at the Yellow Rose RWA chapter on 'The Hero's Journey via TITANIC.'  There were several members I have known for years online, and it was wonderful to finally meet Ashley Kath-Bilsky and Caroline Clemmons. 

On Friday, however, my mother was hospitalized with pneumonia. This was the third time in a year she was in the hospital for pneumonia. I knew she was sick, and was glad she finally went to the hospital.  I decided to cut my trip short and go home on Sunday instead of Monday.  Before I could do so, my brother called me at 4:30 Sunday morning to tell my that my mother had passed away. My sister drove back to Houston with me on Sunday.  Jo and I went to the funeral home today to make the arrangements. We went to her house (which she shares with my brother) to get her clothes and pick up a few personal items.  We spent the evening going through photographs to pick 50 for the video the funeral home will make of mom's life.  What fun that was, I mean, really, it was...looking back at pictures, the fun, the holidays, the goofy ones you don't want anyone to see, the ones you forgot about, the memories they evoked.

I'm tired, but can't sleep.  I am still numb. My mother was a strong, stubborn woman. She was not perfect. If she got pissed at you, she usually stayed pissed for a long, long time (just ask my sister ).  But she lived through more than her share of hard times, physical, emotional and spiritual. She was a rock, too. In the past year, she has been through a lot physically and I think she was just sick and tired of being sick and tired. She did not have the strength to do the things she wanted to do: garden, cook, shop, go places and be active.

I will get through this week (funeral is set for Saturday), I will get through next week, and the week after that....but life will not be the same, because my mom isn't here for me to talk to, to laugh with or to have lunch with (as we did nearly every Thursday).

I love you, mom.  Rest in peace, plant God's garden, and run in the surf!


17 comments:

Jennifer Lynne said...

My thoughts are with you and your family. God bless.

Cynthia Woolf said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother in 2008, two days after my birthday. I know how hard it is, but I can tell you that it gets easier. As time passes we never forget, but it hurts less when we remember.

God be with you and your family at this difficult time.

Savannah Chase said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I'm truly sorry for your loss.

Jami Gray said...

My prayers and thoughts are with you and yours during this difficult time.

Regan Black said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'll be praying for you and your family during this emotional and challenging time.

Mackenzie Crowne said...

So sorry for your loss, Anna. It's so difficult to lose a loved parent, but the grief does eventually soften to allow in those lovely memories, like visits from above. My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours.

Mac

Tricia Schneider said...

I'm so sorry, Anna. I understand the pain of losing a mother. My mom died when I was 11. It's not easy at any age to lose your mom. My thoughts go out to you and your family.

Caroline Clemmons said...

Anna Kathryn, I was numb after I lost my mom. I felt frozen. When I thawed, I cried at everything, so be prepared. My mom died in January of 2007 amd I still miss her. I'm so glad you and Jo had the pleasure of looking through her photos and sharing memories. Bless you and your family.

Calisa Rhose said...

I'm so sorry you lost your mom, Anna. It is hard and it seems no matter how old we are, it's still too young to lose that one person in our life. Prayers for you and your family during this time.

DonnaGalanti said...

I am so sorry you lost your mom and so suddenly. I lost mine to cancer 3 years ago. I know the pain and emptiness. You may need to find who you are as a person again, one without a mother in their life. I hope you have many wonderful family members and friends to get you through this sad time. Keep your memories close. I hope you have many that make you laugh too.

Meg said...

So sorry to hear this, Anna - may your memories keep you strong in the coming months.

Carra Copelin said...

So sad to hear of your loss. I'm sending prayers and wishes for better days your way. God bless you and your family. Gloria Cope

Cathie Dunn said...

I'm so sorry to read this, Anna. How sad you couldn't make it in time. But then, you'll always have the memories of her alive and well in your heart. Going through photos is always emotional.

Wishing you much strength and comfort.

Anna Kathryn Lanier said...

Thank you all for your kind words.

MK said...

If only there were words to convey how sorry I am to hear about your mother. I do hope you and your family find some peace during this time. My prayers are with you.

marybelle said...

My prayers are with you.

Glenn Starkey said...

Prayers are given for your loss. I realize this is a difficult time and wish you the strength to carry on. Best wishes to you.
Glenn