Romance Febraury: Love and Marriage in the 19th Century

These days, couples 'date' – even if they're in fourth grade and only see each other in the lunchroom. In the 19th century couples courted, sparked, kept company, came to call or cavorted. When it turned serious, it became a courtship. In the early part of century, couples were given much more freedom than in the second half, when Victorian attitudes took over and women of genteel families had chaperons.

Still couples found ways to carry on. They'd meet at harvest celebrations, apple parings, go for walks, dinner and theater, attend lectures and even meet in their family's parlors. This private time often led to premarital sex, which led to 33% of all brides in New England being pregnant when they married in the early part of the century. As contraceptives improved and the staunch Victorian attitude moved through society, that statistic dropped to 10% by the 1850's.

Princess Charlotte's Dress

When courting became engagement, weddings soon followed. The familiar white wedding dress didn't become popular until after 1840, when Queen Victoria married in one. Prior to that, a bride wore her best dress, regardless of the color. This poem predicts the happiness of the marriage depending on the bride's dress color:

Married in White, you have chosen right,
Married in Blue, your love will always be true,
Married in Pearl, you will live in a whirl,
Married in Brown, you will live in town,
Married in Red, you will wish yourself dead,
Married in Yellow, ashamed of your fellow,
Married in Green, ashamed to be seen,
Married in Pink, your spirit will sink,
Married in Grey, you will go far away,
Married in Black, you will wish yourself back.

In the early 1800's most weddings took place in the bride's home, usually during the week, as opposed to the weekend. And they were small, family-type gatherings. However, by the end of the century, most weddings took place in a church.

The broom, in many African regions symbolized sweeping away evil spirits and beginning a new life with a clean slate. In the United States, slavery prevented couples from marrying legally and, so they 'jumped the broom' to seal their vows.

In the less populated West, couples would often set up household, then married whenever the circuit minister came through, which could be months or years away. Often time, children would be baptized at the same time.

Also common in the West were mail-order brides – women who came West to marry men they'd only met through ads and correspondence. Thousands of couples married this way. Sometimes, they'd marry as soon as they met, other times, they'd court a few months then marry. The success rate was most likely the same for mail-order brides as it was for typical marriages.

Thanks for stopping by my Romance Feburary blog. Be sure and leave a comment, WITH YOUR E-MAIL, to be eligible for one of my prizes: A $10 The Wild Rose Press gift certificate or a copy of my e-book SALVATION BRIDE.

Check out Skhye Moncrief's blog tomorrow for your next clue. http://blog.skhyemoncrief.com/

~Anna Kathryn

http://www.aklanier.com/